My expectations of others stem from a simple belief—treat to be treated. I don’t ask for anything that I am not willing to provide for others. I don’t ask of others anything that can’t be fulfilled with basic human communication skills.
And since I mentioned communications, it was my understanding that human beings are the only creatures with such complex skills to make things easier and simpler for one another. As in use your words, we are not mind readers.
Basic boundaries
With that being said, I will get into boundaries and my understanding of them.
I came to know boundaries through religion. I learned about personal and public boundaries through the abstract teachings in the Quran. I understood the following:
- I have the right to life, safety, and security
- I have the right to truth. All forms of lying are forbidden for a reason.
- I have the right to property. Stealing is forbidden too.
- I have the right to fair dealings. You can’t raise the prices to your likings.
- I have the right to fair wages.
- I have the right to privacy. Spying and gossiping are big no-no in Islam.
- I have the right to my body, which I can give to a spouse within the limits of consent—marriage, relationships, civil unions, or any social contractual agreement.)
- I have the right to fidelity once a bond is formed and formulated.
- I have the right to a clean environment and space.
- I have the right to rest.
- I have the right to human dignity and respect.
- I have the right to voice my opinion.
- I have the right to free will.
- I have the right to be free.
- I have the right to education.
I am forgetting others, but you get the idea. A person’s humanity and boundaries are highly valued in my belief system.
My responsibilities
While it is not always easy to navigate the world of rights and boundaries due to the diverse nature of humans, it is never a challenge understanding my responsibilities towards others and the collective. We control our own actions; hence taking control of the ship. We are accountable.
It is as simple as Prophet Muhammed’s saying, “You are not a true believer until you love for your brother what you love for yourself.” I understood that others had the same rights as me.
I grew up revering this prophetic saying. It guided many of my connections with others.
I also understood that I had responsibilities towards the collective and mother earth and her inhabitants.
The Sacred Months
In Islam, there are 4 months referred to as the sacred months (el-ash-hur el-hurum). We are not to wage war, hunt, harm animals in the wild, or plants.
It is my understanding that those months align with animals’ mating seasons to ensure their safety and right to reproduce and protect earth’s biodiversity.
Foreign Dealings and Boundaries
Within the Islamic framework, rights and boundaries are inclusive; they are for everyone. However, I must also be respectful for known social and cultural traditions when traveling outside of the local social contract jurisdictions.
For example, as a New Yorker my personal rights grant me freedom to certain acts in public, which are acceptable and tolerated by the majority. I can’t expect to travel to another place and have the same rights in a foreign public environment. I must first learn the local moral code and values to avoid traumatizing someone with a simple act of exposure.
